is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I need to align my fucking chakras
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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