don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
