Can i not drive my cunt home
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
my poor anus
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
