Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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