Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
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