The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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