Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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