theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Enjoy the penises
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
