i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
