What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize
