Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
You just made me feel so damn special
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
