you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
