Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
