How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize