so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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