stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
wow bdsm is so cute
Randomize