I heard we made out
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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