Buhtt sex?
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
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