just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
