just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize