my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize