I only kidnapped one of them. chill
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
