Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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