Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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