I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
