your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
