I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
