Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
