ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
