I wanna bring you to show and tell
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Randomize
