ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
