he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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