Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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