Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
