you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
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