just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
