i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
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