I have demons in me.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Randomize
