I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
