I didn't shave. On purpose
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
