the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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