Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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