he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Randomize
