She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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