Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Randomize
