one might say we're banned from that church
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
