Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
