I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
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