I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
