Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
