Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
