So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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