she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Your cock deserves a montage
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize